Saturday, April 05, 2008

Annie's First Day at the Mansion... March 25, 2008

I attended my first team meeting at new job today. A bit chaotic but any meeting where people of various personalities and professional backgrounds get together is chaotic. Women, mostly, were coming and going, chairs being rearranged for to fit, cell phones and pagers ringing, papers jostling, private conversations, shushing. I introduced myself to my new co-workers and received a warm welcome. In the words of Annie, I think I’m gonna like it here!

Some highlights…

-->We discussed half of the patient list which included 4 deaths, 1 of which was happening as we met. Nurses, social workers, and the physician all chimed in with their experiences, thoughts, observations, and recommendations on what the patients and their families may need. Already a very colorful picture of my future is being painted.

-->A nurse who is relatively new to the organization commended another employee for always helping others and jumping in to get things done. I joked that I’d now put her phone number on speed-dial and everyone laughed. Then, chocolate was passed around! Wahoo!

-->One of the Licensed Practical Nurses (LPN) shared how one of the families she bonded with, who, by all the comments from around the room, sounded like a difficult client, presented her with an American flag that was flown over the Capital to commemorate her becoming a US citizen.

-->I had the chance to talk with one of the part-time social workers, K, who knitted during the meeting. (Joyce, want a job?) She saw me taking notes with a blue pen, and must have noticed the array of colorful choices laid out in front of me, because she passed me a note asking if I had been told that all official documents for patients had to be in black ink. I had not and thanked her. BUMMER!! Seriously, its no big deal, but you all know how much I LOVE my colorful pens!

-->Lastly, I realized I will be doing a great deal of paperwork. (They better recycle!) And K said she never uses the computer! Excuse me, WHAT?!?! The contact sheet for the entire team doesn’t have one email address on it, just phone numbers, which makes sense since a lot of us are out in the field visiting clients and filling out forms on paper and a phone call really is the quickest way to get a message to someone, but NO COMPUTER?!? ME? I know there are email addresses, emailed my resume, didn’t I? There is a system we keep patient information in, but it doesn’t sound like my information will be entered into that system. What if a patient asks me about a program with which I am not yet familiar? I had visions of whipping out a laptop (at this point, I’d even use mine) and getting the answer to their question in a matter of seconds. Now it sounds as if they’ll actually have to wait and let’s face it, its not like these folks really have time on their side! (Jen, I will drink for that!)

No computers and no colorful pens… Annie, are you sure?! As long as they don’t tell me I can’t drink Starbucks’ frappuccinos specifically, I think I will still like it here, but some of you may want to check on me, especially if I haven't answered an email in over a week!

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Tuesday, March 25, 2008

I Got...

A REAL JOB!!!

HA! I bet some of you thought I was going to say ENGAGED! Nope, better! ;)

I got the very job I wanted! Can you believe it?!? I still cannot which is why it has taken me so long to really share the news. You are reading the blog of the new full-time, decently paid and benefited, Hospice Social Worker for Vitas Innovative Hospice Care!! (www.vitas.com) I know I know many of you have voiced your concerns over my sensitivity and seemingly innate inability to say good bye to even a piece of chewed bubble gum (don't ask) and I appreciate and will need your concern in the months to come, but I feel compelled to embrace even my own doubts and fears and move forward in this direction. I have a lot to offer families in crisis and I'd much rather have a job that is challenging, tough and yet rewarding then spend the rest of my days tied to a desk, unfulfilled, and depressed. My biggest concern these days is actually not the tears I will shed (lets be realistic here! I cry at those old McDonald's commercials where the person with down syndrome is so proud to have a job!) but being --deep breath -- ORGANIZED!! Paperwork city here I come!

So how it all happened...
I found Vitas' website via www.volunteermatch.org and emailed the Volunteer Manager, Mary Ellen in late Feb that I was a Master's level social worker who wanted to break into the field and would like to discuss some volunteer opportunities. She called the next day and left a 5 minute message about how she would love to talk to me not only about volunteering but about the possibility of a job (which she was able to leave b/c YES! my answering machine no longer has 32 saved messages! For explanation of that, see above about inability to say good bye) Jon was pretty excited while I was interested but cautious. I had already received a few phone calls about hospice and other jobs, and other than TOAHS nothing really panned out. I called back and left a message, but then started the part-time gig and came down with the flu. I hadn't heard back from Mary Ellen despite the messages and emails I had sent. See? I thought, just another false alarm, but Jon encouraged me to call back one more time. Turns out, she was away for a week and was still very interested in meeting me. We set up a volunteer interview for March 6th.

Volunteer Interview…
I advise those who I’ve worked with in the past to sit down. I arrived 15 minutes EARLY… at 8: 15am! Mary Ellen wasn’t there yet but I made myself at home, looking at brochures and watching other employees walk in to start their day. All were very kind.

When Mary Ellen arrived, I felt an instant connection and she invited me to follow her to her office. On our way she introduced me to everyone we saw, Lynn, Leslie, Jim. Lynn is an older woman with long graying hair she wears swept up in a barrette. I felt a pang of intimidation. Leslie is a short and spunky woman from New Jersey who sang along with her country station. I liked her instantly of course. Jim is a nerdy unassuming man who praised my resume.

Mary Ellen and I discussed volunteering opportunities, reviewed my application, resume and current continuing education courses. She understood it was my ultimate goal to break into the Hospice field and we sat down with Lynn, who I learned is a Patient Care Administrator and a Nurse. She too praised my resume and was grateful I had come to volunteer. Mary Ellen asked about the social work position and she said that they had offered the position to someone and were waiting to hear back. Bummer, but I thought to myself, “I’m here now, finally getting this journey started.” So I hung around till about noon watching videos about hospice and the company and taking tests on HIPPA and blood born pathogens. I set up my first day of volunteering at the office for the following Thursday, March 13th.

“No, it’s good… very good!”
My first day of volunteering started out as normal as any day. I had my Starbucks coffee and was excited to be in the environment even it just meant I was putting together new patient packets. Walking into the office again I felt at home and greeted everyone. Mary Ellen was on the phone so I just put my stuff in her office and headed on down to the collating room. I’m trying to learn how all the paperwork is organized as there is a lot of it when Mary Ellen comes in to say that Lynn would like to talk to me in about 30 minutes. Because I already have a rapport with her is say, “A-oh, am I in trouble already?” and she slyly says, “No, it’s good… very good!” Being an optimist, my first instinct is to think the best, but life has handed me a few sucker-punches over the years and so I’ve learned to temper that instinct some and not get too excited. They know my ultimate goal, they need a social worker, and have expressed how impressed they have been with me and my resume (which in the work-world, doesn’t happen nearly enough) Then again, they also know I do not have a clinical license even though I am pursuing it. Really, I was not about to assume what could be so “good” about this meeting.

Mary Ellen joins me and Lynn and I am ready with pen and paper thinking at the very least they have a project for me. Lynn begins by saying “First things first, lets get you an employee application to fill out. Oh and what salary would you like to make?” Maybe she thought Mary Ellen told me what was going to happen, but I was in complete shock. I said, “Um, WHAT?! I don’t even know what the range is for this position! I’m a bit shocked here.” Luckily Mary Ellen jumps in and says the one thing I’ve been hoping to hear from any hospice organization I involved myself with, “We love your resume, your background, and your willingness to learn. We realize this will be a growth experience for you and we want to go on this journey with you.” WOW!

“And the license part?”

“We’ll support you in earning it.” “Lets get you started with the paperwork and the next step will be for you to meet with Susan, who really will have the final say and she’ll be in on Monday.”

Ugh, so really this isn’t a done deal, but naturally, I go with it. Lynn and Mary Ellen are very excited and because Jim will be out of the country for a few weeks, they want me to attend orientation the very next day and take my drug test. Everything happened very quickly, I didn’t know what to think. I was still in shock at all the praise my resume received! Those documents hardly ever receive much feedback and it really was the first time I received any. You send it out to possible future employers and never hear a word except an email that basically says, “Don’t contact us; we’ll contact you if you are worthy!”

Waiting…
I had another interview downtown that afternoon and had to decide how I was going to tell TOAHS I needed the very next day off. I already called in way too many times when I had the flu, but hearing “no” was not an option and technically I did not have the job yet and I couldn’t burn a bridge. I decided to do the “right thing” and tell TOAHS my dilemma and negotiated working 4 hours then going to Vitas for orientation. By the end of Friday I was exhausted and still not 100% sure I really did have a job. Even after getting a hug from Lynn before leaving for the weekend, I was not convinced. I still had to meet and win over one other person.

Moment of Truth…
In typical Sharyn fashion, I was running a little late on this Monday morning of all Monday mornings! We never established a definite time and already I’ve learned that the office runs in perpetual crisis mode, though you’d really have to look hard to see it. I called in to speak to Lynn to say that I was on my way, only when she answered the phone, I thought she said “Vitas, this is Fran, how many I help you?” so I, thinking this must be someone I haven’t met yet say, “Hi Fran, this is Sharyn Casapulla, may I speak to Lynn?” to which Lynn says, “This is Lynn.” I was absolutely mortified!! Luckily she is understanding and has a sense of humor and really didn’t seem to mind my gigantic oops. She also eased my stress by saying “Don’t worry; we’ll be here when you get here.” Phew!

Our meeting begins and it is Lynn, me and Susan. I had heard a lot about Susan, all good, all professional, except that she doesn’t give too much away with her facial expressions. I was prepared by everyone else that I may not be able to get a read on what she’s thinking. Well watching her around the office before the meeting, I thought to myself, what is all the fuss about? She was smiling, busy, catching up with co-workers. I did not get a stern feeling from her at all, but I still went in to the meeting thinking she held my future, my dreams, all in her hand.

Lynn begins. “Susan, this is Sharyn Casapulla and we’ve hired her as our new full-time social worker.” Excuse me? That was “hired” as in past tense, right? As in done deal so it doesn’t matter what you think? Wow! What was all the fuss about then? Susan welcomes me to the organization and we start talking about next steps, paperwork I will need to do, people I will need to meet. For the first time since this whole thing began, I really started to get excited that this was really happening. I was really getting the chance to do the very job I wanted to do. Then Lynn asked if I had any questions…

“What is your expectation of me for getting my license?”

“Wait. You don’t have your license?”

Here it comes… the bursting of the bubble! How could the universe be this cruel?! They knew from the beginning I didn’t have my license, that I am pursuing it. They loved me, my resume, my experiences. Did we really just go through all this for nothing? I could tell Lynn was almost sick to think she overlooked this important piece of information and I was prepared to hear the worst. But Susan, who had stepped out of the meeting for a minute, returned and Lynn immediately told Susan that she may have made a huge blunder in not realizing or remembering I did not have my license and Susan says, “Oh well, Virginia does not require it for this position, but its good that you are pursuing it. No need to worry, we can assist you with that.” A couple of “are you sures” and big sighs of relief from me and Lynn later, and the deal was sealed. I gots me a job!

My start date is April 1st and while I’m pretty confident this is truly happening, I at first thought I wouldn’t believe it till I actually started, but with that start date, I think I’ll allow myself to only believe it when I get my first pay check!

Monday, March 17, 2008

Bleeding Orange

A few weeks ago, I sat through what would be my first paid day for The Orange Apron Hardware Store (TOAHS). Reluctant interest best describes what I was feeling. Since becoming unemployed, I have admittedly lived it up -- Italy, Florida, Seattle, lounging around, researching new job opportunities, "cleaning" -- and while the lovely state of Maryland (thanks to all my friends who live there!) was still paying me unemployment, the boyfriend wanted me to "do something." (Honestly, he let me lounge around a HELL of a LOT LONGER than I would have let him! ssshhhh!)

So, why TOAHS? Its a question I used to be able to answer, but now that original answer seems so dumb because I have no earthly idea why I'm here. Jon, his sister, and brother all at one time in the past have "bled orange" and while only 2 of the 3 can say it wasn't the worst experience ever, I figured my chances were high of at least making do, of some familiarity and at the very least, having an understand ear to bitch to. So there I was the first day, trying to think positive of the situation, a whole hour early!! (obviously any positive thoughts I had deflated like a big orange balloon!) Those who know me best know how terribly against my nature it is to get up early for anything let alone a job orientation on a Saturday morning. Imagine my "I could have slept another hour" expletives when I learned orientation started at 9am instead of 8. (I know... waaah) Already I'm not impressed and little has really changed since.

I am and in some ways always will be, in the deep crowded corners of my own warped mind, an elitist. When it comes to most jobs, I think I am better than just about everyone else, regardless of how long they may have been doing said job. Having admitted this, it must be said that while I think I'm better than everybody in certain jobs, I am not above doing any kind of job. I've waitressed, schlepped burgers, sweated in front of an industrial dishwasher and loved it, and picked up dog crap! None of these jobs are "any better" than the one I'm doing at TOAHA but at least they are somewhat organized, their processes make sense. At least their customers do not get put on hold, disconnected, or bounced around to various departments before someone, if they are lucky, actually wants to answer the phone and do their job!. And forget about asking for a direct extension or voicemail because they do not even exist here. All calls, well actually only the ones the system deems worth enough to hold onto and not mysteriously drop into phone-tree abyss, end up at moi. Poor bastards! I'm one of the few well intentioned folks, yet I know the least and yet here I am responsible for making sure this customer, who by now is already so irate and irritated at having been on the phone for an hour trying to get a question about a hardware doohickey answered, is heard, helped, and kept. Naturally, hardware doohickeys are not my area of expertise, but I've found its usually not the caller's either so literally, its the blind leading the blind here. And naturally, all I have to work with to help this poor soul (and myself) is a store full of "busy" associates who can't or won't answer my 5Th page and an antiquated DOS based system that may as well be written in Japanese. Despite all this, somehow TOAHS was $100K above the books last week so customers are buying... either that or waiting on the phone for hours for help is still a better use of their time than sitting in traffic to get to the Blue Smock Hardware Store!

So I guess for the time being, I bleed orange... albeit begrudgingly.

Sunday, February 10, 2008

Guns Guns Everywhere!

My weekend spent with the The Nations Gun Show www.TheNationsGunShow.com


I, MadCow, of sound body and udders, admit to having sold my liberal, vehmentaly-against- guns-soul for monetary purposes. My price? $300 American Dollars! Here's what I learned...


1. I can be bought... easily!

2. I can be bought easily and ENJOY it!

3. I too can hate the sin love the sinner(s)-- LOTS OF THEM!

4. Really, there are those out there that MUST have stepped straight out from Deliverance and walked into the Expo Center in Chantilly, VA!

5. Gun toting folk and sellers have big hearts for prissy, fluffy, tiny, Paris Hilton type of adorable dogs.

6. I'll admit, when I saw a lone, young Asian man, I thought of Virginia Tech and wondered, will something like that happen again?

7. I was surprised and pleased at the amount of Gun Control being enforced and amused at the two "Take-no-shit" female law enforcement officers who, well, enforced the "no loaded guns" rule.

8. I contemplated buying a small Tommy Gun.

9. I loved that the show owners and staff depended on me and want me back in April.

10. That The West Wing had it right. If folks like me, willing to listen, learn, and involve themselves with people who think differently, and maybe even --dare I say-- join the NRA (my heart beats faster just thinking of it!), then maybe, just maybe, we can all find the middle ground.

For those who care, I didn't join the NRA but will certainly check out their website to see what all the fuss is about. And I will still back Hilary, despite the fact I wouldn't dare wear my boob-hugging Hilary Clinton T-shirt around these guys no matter how much someone is willing to pay me-- Well maybe I would... for the right price!

Tuesday, November 27, 2007

Growing Up MadCow Style

I am thirty years old and … wait thirty one. I. am. Thirty. One. 3 1. I forget sometimes. I’m really not that freaked about my age, except when I realize that at thirty one I am unemployed and I have to call my therapist by 1pm tomorrow to tell her whether or not I have done anything related to the list we made in our session tonight. At thirty-one I have to check-in with someone I pay because I obviously have not mastered the art of discipline. How did I get here?

The unemployed part I understand… I went to work one day, was called into the office of a VP who also, for some reason, happened to be sitting next to the HR VP with a white folder between the two of them on the table, and was told “we overshot our margins for the 1st half of the year and we’re not going make them in the 2nd. Everyone is being asked to cut corners and in our business its between overhead and generating claims and since we can’t generate more claims, we gotta cut overhead.” Luckily, in comparison to other departments, I had two weeks to clean up and bid farewell to 4 years of what amounted to piles and files of crap and a lot of meaningless meetings, emails, hours spent on something my heart was never that into in the first place. So, being unemployed at 31 doesn’t bother me. In fact, it’s a blessing (more on that to come) one of which I intend to take full advantage.

But the having to answer to a therapist tomorrow by 1pm is just messed up. I’m thirty one!! An adult! I have… um let’s see I have a car. OK, mom and dad gave that to me for a graduation present. I live in a 2-bed 2 bath apartment with my boyfriend, who had to pay for my rent last month because my severance checks hadn’t started. I’m able to pay for cobra, that’s gotta be something “adultish,” right? Am I really just an overgrown teenager? That can’t be right… I actually had a job when I was a teenager, one that afforded me gas for my other bought-by-my-parents car and late night snacks at the Land & Sleaze Diner. I can barely afford my Starbucks frappuccino in the new 12 oz bottle from 7-11 without scrounging for change. This is certainly not the life I had envisioned, but it’s what I have. And it can be changed, right?

Guess it starts with waking up tomorrow, spending some time doing some of the things I said I was going to do, then calling my therapist at 1pm to tell her I’ve done them; or at least started. I mean come on; let’s be reasonable, I am only thirty one!

Thursday, October 18, 2007

I got laid...

... OFF! Sheesh! What were YOU thinking?!?

Yep, your MadCow is headed to the poorbarn or possibly on to greener-pastures! -- OK OK, I'll stop with cute and funny-to-me cliches but only because I may have to hit you up for cash someday!

Answers to some questions:

1. APS Healthcare, my work-home for the last 4 years was "re-invested in" by a company no one has ever heard of but that was excited to work with us and make us better. They didn't want to call this new relationship a "merger" and even have it recorded on a company-wide conference call, that there will not be any lay-offs. I didn't believe them, but thought no way they're touching account management--the presumed face of the company to the clients. Well apparently they didn't care for my face too much!

2. Jon is handling the news much better now that he's recovered from having his stomach pumped, which he had because he swallowed all the lose change we've been saving for 10 years (yes, it's been that long!) so I couldn't get "my grubby little hands on it all!" AND then had the audacity to tell the doctor that he'd rather have his stomach pumped then wait for it all to pass! What he doesn't know is that now I'm seriously thinking of dumping him and seducing his brother...

3. I will need a new cell phone and, for a while at least, will have to fight Jon for computer time... Women of Nerds Everywhere, do you have any suggestions? Man, the least APS could have done was let me keep the laptop! Effers. Oh and at press time, I still have not convinced the only 30 year old male on the planet without one, to get a FUCKING CELL PHONE! (feel free to bombard xxxx
@yahoo.com with reasons he should... I will consider it better than donating money to the Save MadCow from Starvation Fund, at least only if it works!

4. For those of you wondering... I WAS NOT LAID OFF BECAUSE I WORKED FROM HOME AND WOULD OCCASIONALLY TAKE NAPS IN THE MIDDLE OF THE DAY!!

5. After packing-up, downloading illegal contraband, and leaving that Silver Spring, MD office for the last time yesterday at 5:30pm (see? I go er--went to the office sometimes!) I am now looking forward to a long week of rest and relaxation in Florida. Hopefully my dad won't pester me for the money I owe him for our trip to Italy, still on for September, nor my brother try to drag me up to Disney to spend the money I owe my dad... Though dad is paying for the flight down tomorrow, so incase anyone was worried, I AM STILL SPOILED! Truth is, at the moment they know better and I'll be thinking of all you working stiffs (especially my stay-at-home moms, who probably could use a break more than me) while lazying around the pool, drinking coronas and watching TV! And for those still not believing #4, I also did NOT drink alcohol while working from home so my time will be spent differently than what you've spent the last 4 years wondering!

6. At least for the next week, if you'd like to contact me, you may do so by email or calling my dad at 561-555-CASH. I can call you back on his dime-- spread the spoiling so to speak. You can also send checks or money orders and if you trust me, which most of you have at one time or another --even with your children, you may also send your credit card numbers to
MadCow Unemployment


XXXX
Falls Church, VA 22044
Home: XXXXXX



Much love to all and even more to those that send CASH! Please let me know what you've been up to and if you have any odd jobs you'd like me to do. As long as the pay is good and it doesn't interfere with my Oprah watching and bon bon eating, you'll be helping me stay on my feet.

Love,
Your MadCow

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Wednesday, November 16, 2005

Oh My! Have I Become a Blogger??

So here was my morning 11/16/05

Best laid plans… I am working from home today (again) as granted, I woke up late, but no later than usual and got ready, then heard that the beltway was closed on the innerloop near river road (right on my way to work) but would “open soon” so I curled my hair and went to the post office (at least I can say I have my holiday stamps!) then I wondered, “did I turn off my curling iron??” to which I had to come home (burning down my apartment complex would just really not be good for me right now) Then I looked at the clock and realized by the time I made it in, it would be 11:30 and I have a 4 pm appointment in Roslyn that I would have to leave at least by 3pm to make on time. So instead of spending most of my day GETTING NOWHERE, I decided to work from home. Good thing too, because my curling iron was on!